King first got on my radar in 1983 or 1984, but I only read this in 1988. By that time, four of its twenty stories had been adapted, with another five to come. (Not to mention a Dollar Baby many haven't seen of "The Woman in the Room," directed by some guy named Frank Darabont.) Is this some kind of record for short stories in one collection from an author? Probably not. But it's still remarkable. The King phenomenon provoked a feeding frenzy of any optionable work in the 80s and 90s (and still ongoing). This led to some undeniably poor work, but it's still very fun to have so much of this book adapted to the screen, poor or not.
As a result of the above, maybe this is King's most popular short story collection. Maybe not saleswise:
"Collections, as a rule, don’t hit the bestseller lists, especially collections largely made up of tales culled from “men’s magazines.” History proved out, and Night Shift failed to make any impression on the hardcover charts. The paperback publication would fare a bit better: a little over a year later, on March 4th, 1979, it would appear on the paperback charts at #12, peaking at #9. Night Shift was the last mass-market Stephen King hardcover to fail to reach the bestseller list." (Kevin Quigley, Chart of Darkness)
My memory is that this book was everywhere - bookshelves, libraries, dentists's offices, study halls - in the 80s. Skeleton Crew, too. But maybe I'm just remembering my own experiences with the book with all the above and projecting them.
So how does it hold up? Well, take a look at the table of contents. How do you think it holds up? It's an incredibly entertaining read. An EC/ Creepy selection of tales, to be sure - one is hard put to evaluate them as "literary short fiction" in the Raymond Carver or Bobbie Ann Mason use of the term. Although who knows? Put Raymond Carver's name on "Children of the Corn" and Bobbie Ann Mason's on "The Woman in the Room" and perhaps the evaluative lens would change. (This works both ways: put a mediocre story of King's ("The Man in the Black Suit") in the New Yorker of the 90s and that's all it took to make King "a serious writer" in the eyes of those who needed such window dressing to come to that opinion.) But any way you slice it, this is fiction of the "let's go to the library and find the right spell to cast" variety.
I'm not going to re-invent the wheel with any of the below, but here's a list of my favorites, least to most, of King's first collection of short fiction.
20.
"Night Surf"
A little slice of Captain Trips and post-apocalyptic nihilism. It's not bad, just kind of not much there. Atmosphere, some suggestions, that's about it. Once upon a time, though, I loved it; I had a whole movie based on this story in my head, scored mostly to Sonic Youth's Sister (still my favorite album of theirs), when I was 14.
19.
"The Last Rung of the Ladder"
If you know your King biography, some of these tales make you smile a little. While he sets the action here in Hemingford Home (just up the road, presumably, from the James place in "1922") and makes the protagonists brother and sister, this evokes a young Steve and Dave King jumping into hay in their Uncle Oren's barn. Thankfully, Dave fared better in real life than the sister character does here.
Nothing wrong with this one, but there's not much story to it, is there? It feels like a first chapter with potential for something that wanted to be bigger.
18.
"The Boogeyman"
Another one that's not bad but felt like it could've gone somewhere more interesting. King loves the device of one character telling another character a long story. The therapist set-up makes it more realistic here than elsewhere, but sometimes I think the story might have worked better had it not all been just a flashback told to another character.
17.
"I Know What You Need"
Throughout I kept thinking "oh here comes that creepy King kid with his army fatigue jacket!" (Also: How I Met Your Mother.)
It's not bad, but the ending is kind of weak.
16.
"The Man Who Loves Flowers"
If this was an EC annual of some kind, this would've been the one I'd have assigned to Harvey Kurtzman to adapt. His style works for this kind of thing, I think. I'm a pretty big fan of King's short fiction - I mean, one would assume this was obvious considering I'm rereading all of it but just to be clear - but occasionally he writes what I call "one-and-a-half-punch" stories. This is one of them. It sets up a surprise and then that's it. I suppose it's enough sometimes just to create atmosphere. He does that here just fine - in all of these, really. Atmosphere is never much of a problem in any King enterprise.
15.
"Gray Matter"
Whereas this one, I'd have given to Ghastly Graham Ingels. I won't do this for every entry, that might get tedious. But I kept this conceit in mind as I made my way through these stories, and it helped me visualize it in my head.
This one might fit into Creepy or Eerie more than EC. Anyway. It's not bad and admirably gross. I wonder if it inspired the movie Slither in any way shape or form?
14
"Strawberry Spring"
Along the lines of King-bio/King-context augmenting one's enjoyment of these tales, there's allusion to "Hey Jude" playing "endlessly, endlessly" on a jukebox on campus. Easy to picture the (perhaps) real-life inspiration for Sheb standing there and pumping in his quarters.
Some people really love this story. It's okay, not one of my favorites, but I do see it as more than a one-and-a-half-punch. It sets up an ironic twist and surprise, but it feels more well-rounded than some of the others I so designate.
13.
"Sometimes They Come Back"
Everything about this story is solid "A" material until it gets to the spellcraft stuff at the end. It's okay on Buffy or Angel, but I pretty much roll my eyes at this stuff anywhere else. As soon as the antagonists can be dispelled by looking up the right spell or saying the right rhyme, something is lost.
Still, until it gets to that point, it's masterful - definitely an early indicator of the powerhouse of pace and mood to come.
I mentioned how many works in this collection have been made not just into films but as tentpoles of unlikely franchises. This one is probably my number one nomination for such a thing.
12.
"The Mangler"
This one makes a bit more sense to adapt. I've still never seen it, actually - how is that possible?
Still, it's a silly story. It's written well and it's lots of fun. But yeah, virginal blood mixing with belladonna-based pimple medication or whatever it was falling into a laundry machine that rips itself free from its moorings and goes charging down main street... I mean, yeah. Fun but sheesh. I like when King references his laundry days, though.
11.
"Graveyard Shift"
An improbable inspiration for a film that only gets better and funner the older I get. If you care to read what I think of it, just scroll down to the comments here; I leave more remarks everytime I watch it. I'm sure I'll be leaving more before you know it.
I like the film much more than the story, even though, like "The Mangler," it's perfectly fine, well-written, with lots of drive and momentum. But, it just doesn't have the room it needs to be grow. Maybe not a one-and-a-half-punch, but not a one-two-uppercut either.
10.
"The Ledge"
I've seen Cat's Eye something like a hundred times. I think this works better on the screen, but it's really kind of airtight and that's why it's here in the top ten. As metaphors go, it's not the subtlest of them, but it stays focused entirely on the action, which is a kind of subtlety. Its class warfare never hits you over the head, like Titanic, even when its set-up rests entirely on the reader's understanding of it.
9.
"Battleground"
Just as silly as "The Mangler," but what is it about this one that entertains me so? It's just fun in a way I can't really put my finger on. But it's pretty close to that feeling of playing with your toys as a kid, and I appreciate King capturing some of that. I feel the same way about the TNT adaptation.
Could it be improved? Absolutely. Imagine if it was written with the same flair as Ur or "Lunch at the Gotham Cafe." But why punish it for what it isn't? I'll instead share a memory from study hall in 9th grade, when I was reading this story and got to the part where Renshaw is told to surrender and he writes "NUTS" as a reply. I had no idea of the Battle of the Bulge or General McAuliffe at the time and thought this was the funniest, most random thing ever. Imagine my surprise when I learned - the same year, if memory serves, in history class - where it came from.
8.
"Trucks"
What a great little story this one is. I'd dog-eared a page or two to put some quotes but un-dog-eared them without writing them down. A pity.
You'd think I'd find this one to be one of those one-and-a-half-punch deals for not resolving the dilemma(s) it created. But it doesn't need to. As a reaction to the various crises of the early 70s (gas, existential, environmental) it's as relevant and harrowing as any of them. He repeated this feat in Cell, some decades and technologies later.
7.
"Quitters, Inc."
The ultimate quitting-smoking story. Not counting "The Ten O'Clock People." See Cat's Eye and "The Ledge" thoughts above (minus class warfare).
6.
"I Am the Doorway"
I've mentioned the EC conceit a few times. This reads like one of the best EC stories never published, as rendered by Bernie Krigstein or Harvey Kurtzman again. Or hell any of those guys. It's like EC got to do an original-series The Outer Limits episode, adapted by Stephen King.
I like that Venus is still available as a spooky-planet-of-storytelling-choice for writers. This is a great little horror story and I don't mean to short-change it with these scant remarks.
5.
"One for the Road"
I still love this little tie-in to 'Salems Lot, although, like Ur, if you don't know the context, some of its aspects might be a little anticlimatic or odd. I doubt there's anyone out there reading this who doesn't know Salem's Lot, so it's a moot point, but there's that ever-so-mild thing working against it: it's a cool special feature but as a stand-alone story too much is left unsaid or not introduced/ worked properly.
The atmosphere is great, though. Snow vampires are a cool concept. I didn't really like Thirty Days of Night, while we're here. It wasn't awful, but it should've been much cooler. Has nothing to do with "One for the Road," of course, but while we're here.
The atmosphere is great, though. Snow vampires are a cool concept. I didn't really like Thirty Days of Night, while we're here. It wasn't awful, but it should've been much cooler. Has nothing to do with "One for the Road," of course, but while we're here.
4.
"Jerusalem's Lot"
Very enjoyable Lovecraft pastiche. Maybe less Lovecraft than people think and just old-school in general. Clearly written by a guy with much affection for the conventions of the genre and well-read in its practitioners. The expedition to the town and discoveries at the church are wonderfully tense. I thought a little of the similar scene in the labyrinth from the last episode of True Detective season 1. (Also involving cult leaders with harems where "like had bred with like.")
Not meant to be a direct tie in to Salem's Lot, although (a) like I need to tell you that, and (b) I'm happier reconciling it to Salem's than I am Wolves of the Calla. Which isn't a dis to Wolves, just that when I read Salem's, I have no trouble imagining it as somehow related to this novella/ short story from Night Shift, even if details contradict, whereas I prefer to simply pretend the vampire cosmology of the Dark Tower verse does not exist.
Not meant to be a direct tie in to Salem's Lot, although (a) like I need to tell you that, and (b) I'm happier reconciling it to Salem's than I am Wolves of the Calla. Which isn't a dis to Wolves, just that when I read Salem's, I have no trouble imagining it as somehow related to this novella/ short story from Night Shift, even if details contradict, whereas I prefer to simply pretend the vampire cosmology of the Dark Tower verse does not exist.
3.
"The Woman in the Room"
This story is horror by virtue of its subject matter and final plot actions, but it's really quite a well-observed (and therefore, very uncomfortable) portrait of a mother dying from stomach cancer. Something King knew firsthand. The other side of Roadwork.
This was never published anywhere except Night Shift, and it's possible it remains a little off the radar for King's short fiction. I imagine that will change when / if King's work recedes further and further from "popular author"dom and into anthologies and Twentieth Century Literature courses. I think it's at such a time that the quiet, disturbing work like this will receive its due. It's probably the best (as in Literary Fiction "best") story of the collection but only my 3rd favorite. A little too realistic. I appreciate its artistry, but that doesn't make it any easier to read.
This was never published anywhere except Night Shift, and it's possible it remains a little off the radar for King's short fiction. I imagine that will change when / if King's work recedes further and further from "popular author"dom and into anthologies and Twentieth Century Literature courses. I think it's at such a time that the quiet, disturbing work like this will receive its due. It's probably the best (as in Literary Fiction "best") story of the collection but only my 3rd favorite. A little too realistic. I appreciate its artistry, but that doesn't make it any easier to read.
Whereas...
2.
"The Lawnmower Man"
Oh man! For sure audacity/ plot twists, this one really stands out in King's ouevre. But beyond that, this is a pretty compact and sturdy piece of fiction. Like Paul Sheldon and Annie Wilkes go over in Misery, it doesn't have to be believable in writing, it just has to be fair. Everything that happens here is fair.
And of the EC or Creepy artist could have put their individual stamp on this one, had it been offered via those publications. I can picture (and am enjoying doing so) Jack Kamen's, Jack Davis's, Graham Ingels's, Kurtzman's, or Krigstein's (or Johnny Craig's) style quite easily. I like that it's so easy to do that with this story. The EC-side of King's career is quite fun.
And of the EC or Creepy artist could have put their individual stamp on this one, had it been offered via those publications. I can picture (and am enjoying doing so) Jack Kamen's, Jack Davis's, Graham Ingels's, Kurtzman's, or Krigstein's (or Johnny Craig's) style quite easily. I like that it's so easy to do that with this story. The EC-side of King's career is quite fun.
 |
| Notoriously ill-adapted for the screen. |
1.
"Children of the Corn"
And finally, another airtight, wonderful, absurd, harrowing, well-told, well-built little tale, good for what it is but also as the tip of a weird and metaphorical iceberg. This was my favorite story when I read the collection in the 80s, was my nod for the best when I reread it in 2012, and is my favorite now.
It's not the best short story ever written, of course, nor is it even the best short story King ever wrote. But he hit something here that has endured as a touchstone for at least my own generation. King or 80s or pop culture fan or not, the children of the corn/ He Who Walks Behind the Rows touched some kind of archetypal nerve.
It's not the best short story ever written, of course, nor is it even the best short story King ever wrote. But he hit something here that has endured as a touchstone for at least my own generation. King or 80s or pop culture fan or not, the children of the corn/ He Who Walks Behind the Rows touched some kind of archetypal nerve.
Beyond that, I just love it as an uncomfortable window/ deconstruction of two people not communicating and the danger hidden from view. Plus the whole murder and religious crazies and corn-husks in eyeballs and The Blue Man and all the little details.
~
(1)“My memory is that this book was everywhere – bookshelves, libraries, dentist’s offices, study halls – in the 80s”.
ReplyDeleteIf what you say is true, then I’m left wondering what that says about the public reception of King as a “brand name”. I know he has a lot of that “name” recognition still today, but I wonder how much of it is widespread, or even all that well known.
For instance, I can remember back to my pre-King days, and what I knew could boil down to a few things: 1. He wrote horror, and, 2. He was known for this strange town with a funny name, “Castle Rock”. Granted, this was back in 92, and “Needful Things” was still a recent bestseller. Still, that seemed to be as far as the non-reading public got back then.
I wonder if “Night Shift’s” popularity stems from the fact that it was the easiest way for non-readers to enjoy King at the time. Just a thought.
(2)“The more I hear the term “serious writer”, the more convinced I am that the social stigma it’s meant to carry may have more nefarious purposes. The reason is because in “Shakespeare and the Popular Dramatic Tradition”, I was shown a sample of Philip Sydney’s “Defense of Poesy”. While Sydney is willing to defend poetry and the arts, I surprised to see him, in this passage look down on the titular “Popular Tradition” in those very same arts he claimed to defend. The interesting part is that this disdain applied to all forms of folk art, which meant fairy tales, myths, and legend, were “right out”. Coupled with that was the sense that the reason Sydney didn’t like them was because such tales belonged to the very “folk” he despised. In other words, it is just possible that behind phrases like “a serious writer” there may be a lingering issue of class prejudice (at best), or else some form of plain prejudice proper (at worst). So yeah, long story short, I’ve grown very leery all this “serious writing” talk.
(3)Interesting take on “Last Wrung”, though I’m not sure I know where things could go from there.
(4)“The Boogeyman is still one of my favorites, personally. I think of it as a side chapter to “It. Maybe as a look at what Pennywise does if he decides to take a vacation. Looked at from that perspective, it becomes just a bit interesting (if such theories help, that is).
To be continued,
ChrisC.
(5)“Flowers” is one of those King shorts that has its own soundtrack built into it. In this case, it’s “Yes it is” by the Beatles. Seriously, give that song a listen, and then go back and read “Flowers”, it makes for a nice macabre counterpoint that somehow fits the story to a T.
Delete(6)“Grey Matter”. Another one I have a soft spot for. I think it helps to remember that King has several modes of writing. Some of these he is better at than other, however one that I think he is good at is these old, early “EC” style works. These days the more epic, larger than life King seems to be all the rage. I suppose that makes sense from a studio executive’s perspective, however I think that hazard is that it limits the ability to appreciate the more goofy, playful Uncle Steve style of narratives like this.
(7)Coming to “Spring” long after “Atlantis”, it works as a nice, albeit macabre companion piece that links it up to his more supernatural oriented work.
(8)I’ll admit I’m more a fan of the Tim Matheson TV movie than it’s inspiration. The follow-ups are all just plain crap, however. It was a pleasant surprise to find a retrospective on it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Os_75l8XZ88
To be concluded,
ChrisC.
(9)Enjoyed the “Graveyard Shift” short story. The film has been a growing presence on my radar of late. One of these days. Yes, definitely something in the queue.
Delete(10)I like the movie version as well. It’s just easy for me to conjure up and alternate version of this film where the segments are grouped around the theme of “tiny terrors”. You start with “Battleground, then make the film a more cohesive narrative with “The Ballad of the Flexible Bullet”, from there you go onto the main “Cat’s Eye narrative with Drew Barrymore.
(11)Insert “Patton” dialogue of choice here re: “Battleground”.
(12)As an epilogue/closer, “Road” works pretty fine on it’s own for me. I once gave the outline for a possible adaptation, and I still stand by it as the pace way to make something like this for whichever screen you choose.
(13) Like “Jerusalem’s Lot” quite bit. I also hear ya about how these elements were handled in the “Tower” series. I’ve reached an interesting conclusion about how it might have been better, however that’ll remain waiting in the wings for now.
ChrisC.
(1) "I wonder if “Night Shift’s” popularity stems from the fact that it was the easiest way for non-readers to enjoy King at the time. " Yeah that very well could be. As that King explosion of content happened in the early to late 80s (not like it ever really slacked off, just slowed down at various times) I can picture some non-horror reader curiously picking up NIGHT SHIFT and finding it fairly accessible.
Delete(5) I can hear that!
Delete(9) I look forward to hearing your thoughts on it.
(13) As well as your ideas of improving the tale/ DT connection.
(1) "Is this some kind of record for short stories in one collection from an author?" -- I'd love to know for sure. My attempts to obtain an answer via Google weren't successful. But it really might be the record-holder; certainly if you're only counting true collections, as opposed to whole-career anthologies or the like, I'd say it stands a good chance.
ReplyDelete(2) "Night Surf" -- I like this one more than you do, but it's probably nonessential. Impossible to do so, but I wonder hoe I'd evaluate it if "The Stand" didn't exist.
(3) "The Last Rung on the Ladder" -- You know, Hemingford Home is kind of unsung among King's fictional towns. But it pops up fairly often. I'd rather watch THAT series on Hulu, to be honest. I kid, but Mother Abagail's long life could actually make a pretty fine tv drama. Nobody'd watch it except me, but I'd definitely watch it.
(3) "The Boogeyman" -- Whatever its deficiencies might be, I will always treasure the feeling I got when I read that story for the first time and got to the final paragraph. For that reason, I think this will probably always place well with me among King's short fiction.
(4) Your notion of "one and a half punch" stories is interesting. I sense that I might (in some cases) differ with you on what stories get classified that way, but I also think we might be in agreement that this tends to be the worst King provides in his shorts. I mean, sure, there are a few clunkers on the list; but remarkably few, all things told ... and even when he fails to land a knockout, you typically know he's been swinging.
(5) "Gray Matter" -- Apropos of not-quite-nothing, I'll mention that the new "Creepshow" series on Shudder is going to feature an adaptation of this story. Thumbs up, says I.
(6) "As soon as the antagonists can be dispelled by looking up the right spell or saying the right rhyme, something is lost." -- That's certainly a problem with fantasy, if the writer isn't very careful to avoid it. I can't remember how I feel about its use in "Sometimes They Come Back." My memory of that story is poor on specifics. I loved it the first time, though, and that feeling sticks with me even when I can't quite remember what it is I'm supposedly loving.
(7) Man, I don't know what to think about whether you'd like Tobe Hooper's "The Mangler" or not. All I know is, it's grown on me. Crazy flick.
(8) At this point, I'm prepared to say that I like the movie version of "Graveyard Shift" more than I like the story. The story has its moments, but it's also very illogical. So's the movie, but the movie, I think, is self-aware to lean into it. I demand a special-edition blu-ray!!
(9) Regarding "Battleground" -- "It's just fun in a way I can't really put my finger on." -- I think maybe it's got something (for me if not you) to do with the fact that Kign seems to be relishing a challenge. The notion of a literal killer toy-soldier set assaulting a dude in his apartment is flat-out ridiculous. But through the power of his prose, King manages to make it seem plausible for this brief amount of time. That's no small achievement. That's what ANY writer is presumably going for: causing their readers to buy in to the scenario for long enough to empathize with the characters. That King (or anyone) could achieve that for even a sentence or two with such a weirdo premise says a lot about his ability to elicit empathy from his readers. Not for nothing is this guy such a huge bestseller.
(10) I like the fact that he doesn't resolve "Trucks." In a way, that lack of resolution IS a resolution. King can (and sometimes does) achieve more with a non-resolution than with a resolution.
(8) The film has become something more than itself in the years since it came out. Probably because the era/ context has moved on, and now it stands out even more weirdly. Its rough spots become adorable - even part of the fun, or take on meaning they never could have had.
Delete(10) I think it works there, for sure. Other places not so much. I'll have to make an official list, but I think he may be a wash on this non-resolution-resolution approach. For every good one I can think of, I can think of one where it doesn't work for me.
(11) "Quitters, Inc." -- I could just as easily have said this about "The Ledge," but boy, I think "Cat's Eye" has aged really well.
ReplyDelete(12) "I Am the Doorway" -- I did a deep-dive on that one a year or two ago, and was struck anew by how weird and creepy the orbiting-Venus bit is. That planet is scary, and I suspect it's even scarier than we know.
(13) I'd love to hear an opinion of "One for the Road" from someone who wasn't familiar with "Salem's Lot." I kind of think maybe it might work. King is fairly good at suggesting big backstories to his work, so it might simply read as off-the-cuff worldbuilding for the uninitiated. Or not; I could see it going either way.
(14) Ditto on the non-love for "Thirty Days of Night," by the way. The movie, at least; I know the comics not. I felt like it was a great premise in search of a good story. And yet, I'll cut John Carpenter's "Vampires" all the slack in the world. Hey, I never claimed to make sense.
(15) "Jerusalem's Lot" -- I've always taken it as a Lovecraftian pastiche, and a great one at that. But the more I learn about Lovecraft's work, the more I come to understand that he himself was working within a tradition established by other writers. And, also, he spawned imitators (like Robert Bloch) who probably influenced King as much as he himself did. Still, whoever you want to say this story is paying homage to, I think it's a lot of fun.
(16) Do I understand you correctly, in that I am supposing you read the Dark Tower books as though "Salem's Lot" happened in those stories, but read "Salem's Lot" itself as though the Dark Tower books did not then later take place? If so, that's a pretty crazy way to look at that. And I salute you for it, because that's precisely how I think of all of those things! (I'd add that, weirdly, King's multiversal approach makes it possible to actually do both. Very cool.)
(17) "The Woman in the Room" -- That one (along with "Last Rung") certainly stuck out like a sore thumb the first time I read this collection. I'm glad they did; I was too young to understand either story, and kind of wish I still was. King has written a handful more like it over the years, though; enough to make me wonder if one could assemble a viable collection of his "literary" stories and pitch it at the types of literati who wouldn't normally give him the time of day. See also, "The Reach," "All That You Love Will Be Carried Away," "Herman Wouk Is Still Alive," "Batman and Robin Have an Altercation," "A Death," and maybe even "Morality" and "Laurie." I'm guessing they'd still turn up their noses.
(18) Ever seen the Walt Simonson comic of "The Lawnmower Man"? It's pretty great. What a weird story. That's one that had a big impact on the first read. I've probably grown a bit less impressed by it over the years, but only a bit; and I wonder if the association of the movie has been part of that.
(19) If so, I think the same thing has happened with "Children of the Corn." I used to think an adaptation, however awful, was incapable of harming the source material. I no longer think that's true in all cases. No matter what, "Children of the Corn" IS a fine story. And speaking of adaptations of it, if you've never seen the early-eighties Dollar Baby "Disciples of the Crow," it's worth seeing if you can find it.
(16) You got it. I'll go along with Father Callahan and type-lame vampires while reading Dark Tower content. But when I read or discuss Salem's Lot, I am reading and discussing a work that is wholly distinct and compartmentalized from the Dark Tower.
Delete(18) Now that you mention it, I sure have, but I'd forgotten about it completely! I should have nicked from screencaps from it for this post.
(19) I have not seen it! I'll try and hunt it down.
Compare "Children of the Corn" - another King-related film that has become something much more than it ever was upon release or by its own merits - to "Graveyard Shift." Both fun movies, both poor in their own different ways. One is far more of a widely known cultural touchstone for a generation, for sure. Only 7 years separate their release, I think, but might as well be two entirely different generations' movies. I don't know where I'm going with this, truthfully. But I wish there were 9 or 10 crappy "Graveyard Shift" sequels.
(16) I say it's crazy, but in fact I think that's the only sensible way to go at it. I like both of those things, but only if I can keep them separate.
Delete